The Breakup Test: 5 Questions to Ask Before Giving 'Em the Boot
Is it better to be the breaker-upper or the dumpee? With so much attention being paid to those poor people dumped every year, no one ever takes time to think about what it's like to be the dumper. Hardly an enviable position, the decision to break up with someone can breed feelings of guilt, paralysis and depression.
To alleviate some of this anxiety, here's a list of 5 questions to ask yourself before you give someone the boot.
Question 1: Has There Been a Major Change in My Life?
"Relocation, career change, an illness -- any of these factors can trigger problems in a relationship."
Relocation, career change, an illness -- any of these factors can trigger problems in a relationship. If you're stressed out about something, be it a job or family problem, it's all too tempting to generalize these feelings to include your partner. It's very easy to think that if you got out of this relationship you would feel better. In reality, you need to deal with the problem rather than blame it on your partner.
Question 2: What's My Happiness Ratio?
Being blissfully in love with your partner 24/7 is a wonderful concept in theory, but as we all know, real-world relationships rarely live up to these expectations. Many people assume that they have to be 100 percent satisfied with their partners in order to stick with them, but good luck ever finding this perfect scenario!
A better strategy would be to adopt the 80 percent rule.
Ask yourself:
Am I satisfied with my partner 80 percent of the time or more? If the answer is yes, then you're working with pretty good odds. If the answer is no, you may want to consider moving on.
Question 3: Is He/She Abusive?
Abusive behavior comes in many forms. There's physical abuse where someone hits, slaps or shoves you. A verbally abusive partner degrades you with harsh words and insults. And the most difficult to identify and pinpoint: psychological abuse. This form of abuse can involve overly controlling behavior, emotional blackmail, and episodes of extreme jealousy. If your partner engages in any of the above behavior, don't just walk -- run from the relationship.
Question 4: Have I Expressed My Frustration?
Many of us think that if our partner was right for us, he/she would be able to understand our needs intuitively without us ever having to communicate. While it would be great if our partners could just read our minds, the truth is that few of us are telepathic.
Good communication is required in every relationship.
So before you give your partner their walking papers, make sure to discuss your doubts and concerns so they have a chance to make it up to you.
Question 5: Am I Willing to Work at It?
Whatever your gripes or complaints, there's one factor that can make or break your union: your mutual desire to work on the relationship. If you're not both committed to improving your quality of life together, there's very little hope for the future.
And remember, actions speak louder than words. If both of you make a concerted effort to work on the relationship and make the necessary changes that are required, there's really no reason to call it quits.
This is my WHAT NOT TO BUY for my birthday:
Things i suggest for a gift (muahahaha...):
aiya... most happy will be people coming to my party celebrate for me... lol !!!
LG Viewty KU990
http://viewty.lgmobile.com/sg/
From the webby... u can go check it out... i love the camera functions and whats more.. ITS A TOUCH SCREEN !!! and can edit the photos... so cute and cool... my aim for now !!!
then dear got upset... he feels why wanna watch a movie also so difficult.. haii... i dont know how to say... well.. in the end i told him to park at wheellock then we walk to LIDO lo...
we got ourself a parking lot... but in the end we found out we parked at LIAT TOWER... lolx... instead of wheellock... damn orchard road and those signs !
now... we reached LIDO... i thought the next show starts at 6 plus.. because i got free movie voucher that i can exchange... then in the end... the auntie say 5.15pm got one... digital one... den i was like.. huh ? now ?? now is 5.15pm what.. then she look at the clock.. oh ya now...
so we brought the tickets and went into the cinema... we didnt brought popcorn or nachos... because the queue is damn long and i dun even know where is the queue line... all here and there...
we watched the show... ENCHANTED...
i think its every girls dream lar.... hard to see this kinda love in reality... anyhow.... we went to FISH & Co for dinner... hee.. i think im abit dumb... i told him i wanted to eat sakae sushi just to fake him so i can bring him to eat F&C. cause he wanted to eat that.. then in the end i dont know where is F&C. then when i saw sakae i turn and go away... den he ask me where i wanna go... sakae is over there... then im like ... ok.. shit.. cannot fake liao... so i tell him i wanna bring him go eat F&C. den he say.. F&C is beside sakae sushi la...
DUMB LITING DUMB !!!
ok den... when we are queuing for F&C. i saw this big ZEE thing... is that whats its called? lolx.. anyway... never write pricing or i think i will buy it already... damn lo.. so cute.. pineapple head...
after eating dear say go far east plaza walk walk.. so we past through LIDO again... but this time round... i wanna buy the chocolate and take pictures.. lolx... the chocolate i buy 200g for S$10... 1st time ever buy M&M chocolate so expensive.. lol... make me dun feel like eating it...anyway.. before we left.. i took a pics of orchard lighting...
hmmm.... ok la... ends a saturday...